Understanding Another

“I just want to be understood!” What does this mean?

What does it mean to understand another person? What does it mean for someone to understand you?

One way to understand someone is by sharing the same experiences and same ways-of-being. But even being within the same family as another, our experiences, personalities and perspectives can be quite different.

Therefore, we can think of understanding this way:

Understanding is relating to the other. Understanding is empathy.

“Empathy is the capacity to understand or feel what another person is experiencing from within their frame of reference, that is, the capacity to place oneself in another's position.”
- Wikipedia

We can relate to what someone is feeling or going through because of our own life experiences and by putting ourselves into his/her shoes. The process of understanding includes asking questions so we can better see where the other person is coming from and what matters to him/her.

Sharing this type of understanding with another is a big part of what a close relationship is, and to be able to deeply know each other. With this type of understanding, people can easier have compassion and offer applicable input to, and support for, each other. Understanding is so helpful in communication and for bouncing ideas off of each other, etc. It's like having two brains instead of one.

Understanding someone is also part of having discernment, in order to determine how much involvement, if any, you want with this other person. Additionally, if a person doesn’t want to take time and put forth effort to understand you, this should also be taken in consideration when deciding your involvement with him/her.

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