Why Are Creeps the Only ‘Willing’ and ‘Available’ Ones?

It's so creepy.

When craving a shared reality, a fox-hole type partnership (we got each other's back), and to deeply know and relate to one another, we can easily get sucked into an all-consuming relationship with a creep (on whatever level and in whatever form we each define ‘creep’).

It seems that there are many creeps that are available in time, space, responsiveness/reactivity and “willingness” in their lives, oddly.

Situations with these types seem to encapsulate quickly and directly the illusion of the type of relationship we crave and need. Except it's not real. I recommend ALWAYS steering clear of intimacy until fully vetting the person because intimacy is kryptonite.

Many people who aren’t creeps tend to fall on the spectrum of dissociation, dismissive avoidance and/or performing to fit into the mainstream—thus, not being willing and available on a deeper level.

Also, we must get crystal clear on our relationship needs for giving and receiving. We live in a culture which shames us for what we need (see 2nd sentence in what I wrote) just as our family-of-origin likely did--we have to not give a shit about what anyone thinks of our needs and be wiling to be alone until someone who is a match in needs, standards, values, morals, and in desire for shared reality and sacred partnership shows up.

It's lonely as hell. But it beats, any day, the psychological-thriller experiences of trying to create connection and resonance with frauds and The Truman Show actors.

Being alone until the right person comes along is an act of courage and dignity. (And is much different than being alone to avoid accountability, commitment and letting go of superficial).

Hang tight and pray for help.

Do you need support in standing strong with your standards and self-respect? Please contact me. I’d love to help you.