Blank Stare When You Share?

Numerous times in my life I have shared with people information about unjust and unethical situations I experienced, only to be met with a blank stare.

Many times the blank stare was accompanied by a scoff (mockery), or confusion as to why the situation was a problem, or an implication that I was to blame.

Some of these blank-staring people were even people who I loved very much. Whether this response was from a loved one, an acquaintance, a service provider, or some other stranger, I’ve always been flabbergasted by such responses.

I know for sure that at least some of these same blank-staring people had been through their own share of betrayal, unjust and unethical treatment. Yet, they seemed to dissociate from it. They wouldn’t recognize that when they don’t work through it, it always seeps out in some other unconscious and dysfunctional ways.

Nonetheless, their blank-stare responses are a form of stonewalling and sometimes even gaslighting.

I have to say that it’s extremely concerning when people—dissociative or not—lack conscientiousness, empathy and the ability to relate. As soon as this is discovered about them, the very best next action is to be quiet and stop sharing. They’ve showed you who they are and are not to be trusted for you to confide in and to expose any more of yourself to them.

If they don’t understand and agree about unethical and unjust behaviors, then what is stopping them from using what you’ve shared against you? My experience has shown that there’s nothing to stop them from causing some form of harm—including to your rights to privacy and individual sovereignty.

Remember this, no matter how “nice” or helpful a person has seemed to be.

All of this applies also to sharing feelings and other vulnerabilities—not just unjust and unethical experiences.

I really regret confiding in people before I learned if they can relate to me and if they are protective….or not. I especially regret getting into relationships with such people (or continuing relationships when they are people I’ve known since childhood, such as relatives).

Do you need support in healing from these types of people and in empowering yourself to use judgement and discernment when interacting with others? Please contact me. I’d love to help you.