Tip: Tolerating Superficiality is NOT a Rite of Passage

I can see now that my whole life I subconsciously thought the only way to get to depth, real connection, resonance, relating, sincerity and emotional safety in relationship and allyship was my having to tolerate superficiality—including others’ small talk, distraction, enthrallment about shallow things, performances, evasiveness, lack of sincerity, etc.

I thought that if I would just stick around, then eventually the other person would see my sincerity and that I’m genuine. And then we could get to the good stuff.

Hindsight, this is an area I have been very naive about. It’s probably because I had to form this belief when dealing with a mother like mine, starting when I was very young.

Now I finally see that superficial actions, enthrallment over shallow things, and performance are many people’s end-all. That’s all there is for them. That’s how they do life. That’s who they are.

Realizing this to my core very recently has completely blown the cover off of my entire life of effort and hope and investments in relationships and in dealing with people in general.

I’m so glad and relieved to finally see this. Because truth has always set me free. I have always only wanted truth. Not games. Not performance. Not smoke and mirrors. Not pretending. Not flattery and praise. Not talking for the sake of talking. Truth.

There is no rite of passage to reach closeness, depth and shared ethical connection. It either already exists within both of you and is created together. Or it doesn’t and won’t.

I can’t express how much easier this is making life for me. I don’t have to tolerate any b. s. ever again. I can fully protect myself from anything and anyone who isn’t a match. I can preserve my energy and investment for only that which truly matters from a place of integrity, ethics, and truth.

Sick of the nonsense? I’d love speak with you. Pro truth. Pro reality. Realist. Genuine. Sincere.