Why I Don’t Hang Out with Anyone I Know
I would love to go out to dinner or beverages, or some other public or private activity with another person. I even know plenty of people, and I’m sure some who I don’t even know yet, who would probably gladly hang out with me. But, besides my adult children, anyone I know, and most people in general, lack what I desire and need to receive and give in relationship.
No Allyship: They wouldn’t protect or stand up for me or the relationship.
No Loyalty: They are not invested in me beyond their own convenience or amusement
No Relational Integrity: Their words and actions don’t line up; they can say one thing and do another.
No Protection from Others: They won’t guard or stand for the relationship or boundaries.
No Shared Reality / Co-Processing: They can’t engage honestly about life, work, or problems; they distort or avoid truth.
Flippancy: They are focused on momentary stimulation or entertainment, not meaningful interaction.
Lack of Value for My Time: My attention, insight, and investment are not treated as valuable and precious.
Risk of Exploitation: They may use my time, attention, or contributions as social or emotional supply.
Inconsistent Engagement: They flit in and out of my life and the lives of others without regard for relational impact. They do not show up consistently in day-to-day life.
No Resonance or Alignment: They do not actually relate to me, understand me, or share my axioms and principles. As such, they can’t give me much feedback that’s relevant to me. And likely they don’t genuinely care about my feedback either.
Boundaries Are Not Respected: They do not naturally honor limits to protect the connection or me.
No Reciprocity: They do not meet my core relational requirements of allyship, protection, communication, co-creating and co-processing.
Emotional Drain: Without the my relational needs for giving and receiving, it exhausts and disappoints me—and even feels like mockery.
I used to be ignorant in thinking that my time spent and invested in people who had the time for me would lead to something real and deep. I was always wrong. If I don’t hit the ground running with someone due to shared reality, ethics, principles and axioms, it’s a no-go for me now.
Do need to talk with someone who is Pro truth, Pro reality, Realist, Genuine, Sincere? I’d love speak with you.